Dear Patriot Tears #16

"Teams like the Miami Dolphins, Oakland Raiders, and Atlanta Falcons throw the season so they can get a better draft pick. The Pats organization is build on winning; hence why even in a down year they win 11 games. Remarkable really. NE will pick #19 or #20 in the 09 draft, which should give the team an oppertunity to pick up a stud. Bill Belichick and the rest of the organization did a fantastic job this season, especially considering every expert wrote off the team after what happened in week 1."

Posted by Paul Pedersen December 28, 08 07:44 PM

Dear Patriot Tears,

Your team is so noble.......they actually TRIED after a player was injured......amazing concept! Perhaps they should be rewarded with a higher draft pick!

You're an idiot! The Raiders don't throw games! They are actually that bad! Get it straight!.....and proof your posts, nard!

We hate to use a Celtic Girl on back to back days but we received so many comments yesterday that we decided to go back to the well. Enjoy!

Almost Masshole of the Week via USC

Matt Cassel's father died last Tuesday in San Bernardino yet he went out and shredded the Raiders on Sunday for 4 TDs in a 49-26 Patriot victory.

With a heavy heart and all due respect we award Matt Cassel, out of Southern Cal, the Almost Masshole of the Week. Our sincere condolences and thank you for embarrassing the Raiders.

After Tom Brady wend down in Week 1, we felt that the Patriots would still have a solid chance of going 10-6. Right now they sit at 9-5.

Damn Uneditable Blog Polls!

Are these pads tight or.....is...my...heart.....

The first person I thought of was a blog poster with the moniker "Die Teddy Die".......The word on the street is that aging linebacker Teddy Bruschi is done for the year with a knee injury and we cannot tell a lie....WE'RE PISSED OFF!

We don't actively cheer for the injury of other players even if they are lowly New England Patriots...this even includes the QB known as Zoolander. We were horribly disappointed to see him injured to start the year but hindsight is 20/20...we probably wouldn't have beat the Pats had he been healthy so it worked out for us, we'll take it.

gratuitous ACL destruction shot

But as we profess to not encourage the season ending sort of injury that many Patriots have been subjected to in '08 there is no reason why we cannot, in good taste, question which injuries our readers most enjoyed this season....

This is all a very long way of saying that we are unable to edit our poll to include the Bruschi injury nor will we be able to add Junior Seau when that geriatric breaks a hip in week 17. The only foresight we have shown here at the blog is the possible sideline maiming that might occur to Bill Belichick (that is the sort of injury that we do condone and actively cheer for). The Raiders do a lot of stupid things so we won't rule out a sideline chop block on ol' Bill....after all, the Raiders still have the Tom Brady "tuck rule" to gripe about from the '02
playoffs.

This was an official apology to the poster known as "Die Teddy Die".

The Intersection of Carl Spackler and Charger Fan

So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking.

So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one -- big hitter, the Lama -- long, into a ten-thousand foot crevice, right at the base of this glacier. And do you know what the Lama says?

"Gunga galunga...gunga -- gunga galunga."

So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me.

And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know."

And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness."

So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

No matter how the season ends....we are 3-0 in our 2008 grudge match games. Eleven consecutive games and counting against the Pirates from the Bay and the utter destruction of the Patriots back in October....so we got that goin' for us, which is nice.

Chargers 34
Raiders 7