Alternative Sports on the Tube/Laughing your Ass off/Week in Review/The Future of this Blog

Where to begin? Let's get right to the sport of watching television. In the last three days I've seen three of the funniest things ever---busting my gut, coughing, tears flowing from the eyes. I must share and I don't feel in the least bit guilty that these videos are off of our topic of sports. This is sport!

DATING:
For those who enjoy watching train-wreck television we bring you Daisy of Love. What happens when you lock up a bunch of dudes in a house with an unlimited supply of alcohol and they irresponsibly leave the patio doors wide open? Naturally, a skunk will wander in to house and drunks will try to trap it. What ensues is the funniest shit you will ever see (think Stand By Me during Gordy's tale about Lard-Ass and the pie eating contest.....)

FIGURE SKATING:
I had never seen the Will Ferrell film Blades of Glory and I still haven't. But I did watch one scene and I believe it was the first time they skated together in competition. In searching for a video that best captured the same disaster on ice that I witnessed, I settled on this one. It also has the perfect song to go along with it. Enjoy.

MOTHER LOVING:
This was the Justin Timberlake/Andy Samberg follow up to Dick In A Box. It originally aired a few weeks back for Mother's Day and then I saw it at the beginning of the week.....and then it re-aired last night. Perhaps not as good as D.I.A.B but hilarious none the less...

SDSU AZTECS:
Stephen Strasburg got his first loss of the year on Friday night against Virginia in the opening game of the Irvine Regional. Dude pitched like crap.....gave up two runs.....only struck out 15. At least he went out guns blazing.SDSU was eliminated tonight by the UCI Anteaters who are facing UVA as we write and looking to force another game against the Cavs tomorrow. I'd like to see Irvine representing SoCal in Omaha so we'll throw our support behind the Uncircumcised Penises of UCI. For more on SDSU's season you should go to 619 Sports.

PADRES:
Padres went 3-3 on their road trip this week to maintain their .500 winning percentage. Jake Peavy is still a Padre. Adrian Gonzalez is destroying National League pitching--hit his 20th HR today and The Effect picked up his 15th save after blowing one last night. While there has been talk of when Jake Peavy will be dealt and not if, SI.com's Jon Heyman proposes that the Padres would be much better off dealing Adrian Gonzalez. It pains me to say it but he's right. AG's contract is so cheap relative to his talent (Gold Glover and potential HR leader) that the Friar's could get a boat load for him. Not to mention that we have two 1b prospects as well as the possibility that with the 3rd pick in the draft we might take a kid out ofUNC who plays...1b. I'd hate to see him go though.....he's a guy who could end up being like Gwynn: Synonymous with the San Diego Padres. A legitimate retired #....unlike Winfield and Garvey.

In addition to trying to write entertaining blogs I also try to collect and gather other good examples from the field. I came across a great blog by a Twins fan called The Daily Something. Great analysis and a nice little piece on the mystery that is The David Eckstein Love Fest. It's a reasonable question to ask of a player who's hitting .220 but has been described by GM Kevin Towers as our 2009 MVP. I did my best to explain it to him in thatblog's comment section....maybe you could add something about the little fella.

More Peavy trade potential as well as the downward spiral of Khalil Greene from SI.com's Jon Heyman.....poor guy. And to think I actually thought that the Padres could have held him until July and sold high...waiting 'til July would have got us a bag of balls and a case of Budweiser from the Cards.

VOTE FOR MANNY:
Other good blogs I came across: It is about the money, stupid and Vote For Manny. Both of which come from a New York blogger named Jason Rosenberg. The former is his primary site and the latter is a little movement to get Manny into the All-Star game. Purpose: to shed light on the stupidity of the whole process as well as to make Bud Selig acknowledge thePED issue as it pertains to Manny being elected while serving a suspension. It's a great idea on many levels the least of which is to show how bogus the selection process is (Suspended playerManRam is running in 4th place so as an OF he needs to move up one spot where as Adrian Gonzalez is running in about 8th place....PEOPLE...He plays in a pitcher's park and has 20 bombs! Do The Right Thing!). I wrote a post on it so go read it and then sit on-line for 10 minutes and cast 25 votes for Manny Ramirez and Adrian Gonzalez. BTW: Manny Ramirez is an unequivocal A--HOLE!

CHARGERS:
SI.com's Jim Trotter writes about some Running Backs who he thinks are on the rebound in '09......take a guess....

NFL NEWS:
A good site for NFL/Entertainment news is FJuice @ nfljuice.com, and it's not just because we got linked from there. If you want a great way to start the day check out Morning Wood....isn't that the way everyday should start?

THE FUTURE:
We have changed our URL and exported all of our posts to a new site. The current URL is shite and was never intended to be a long term address primarily because we never really intended to do this long term. Anyways, the new address will honor San Diego sporting history as well as explain why we're even doing this....aside from the fact that all parties involved are somewhat crazy. Await word, ye Faithful Eleven.

More English

Larry English Info:

"The Chargers' selection of OLB Larry English is legitimately shocking for a variety of reasons."
Read more at:[San Diego Bolt Report]

Larry English @ #16

Was OLB a need (Merriman and Phillips)? Looks good on video...

By a landslide...

Charger Fans just say, "Rey!"

Gone-zalez.....sorry, had to do it

Big #88 has moved on and since we have pretty poor Safety play we'll go ahead and kneel, bow our heads, give the sign of the cross, and say.........thank God !!!!

Typical Quentin Jammer 'form tackle'......Typical Clinton Hart?

Chargers win in Gonzalez trade [UT-Bolts Blog]

Charger Fan Polling and KT on Donald Trump's Hair

Kevin Towers was on XX1090 today with Darren Smith discussing Monday night's opener at Citi Field......and the discussion began with an assessment of Trump's rug.....KT was up close and personal and his take on it was pretty funny. You should listen to it. They also talk baseball.
Kevin Towers on with Darren Smith
[XX1090-Audio 4/15]

Also catch Jody Gerut comparing Citi Field to playing a game on the Strip in Vegas.....a reference to garish billboards, not the Girls of Glitter Gulch.
Jody Gerut on with Darren Smith
[XX1090-Audio 4/15]

San Diego Union Tribune readers have been polled and here's what they say:

C'mon......6-10? That's moronic.....64 morons feverishly clicking away.
What say you, San Diego Sports Fans?

Editor's Note:
Check out the new 619 Sports website including Craig Elsten and Chris Ello podcasts.
[619Sports.net]

2009 Schedule Is In

Charger Girls say: "Decide which game you're going to!"

NFL Schedule Release

The newly selected 2009 Charger girls urge you to consider a fall visit to one of the below locales (except Oak-town...let's be serious). We know the 2009 away opponents and on Tuesday we'll find out the dates. Each location provides positive attributes based on the time of year the game is played. The one thing that doesn't change.....the food. I was watching the travel channel this morning and Memphis, Tennessee looks tasty! Fried chicken and ribs anyone?

2009 NFL Schedule Release on Tuesday
[Chargers Blog]

Cholla Cable Comments on Craziness

I open up the UT and what do I see.....Cholla! I hear his righteous proclamations in my sleep and now I have to read his opinions in the Sports section....

“It's a crazy time in this division,” Oakland Raiders coach Cholla Cable said Tuesday at the NFL owners' meetings.

Its only crazy because of that kid up in Denver, and by "kid" I mean McDaniels....Cutler is the "Crybaby". Yea real crazy! The only thing crazier would be that lard ass QB in Oakland developing some game.

Nice. Real Nice Cholla! The least you could have done was get some Black Widows slapped on the side of that Silver n' Black helmet. You useless C@#T!

For more about Cholla and how consistent the Chargers are:

Chargers are a model of consistency in topsy-turvy AFC West
[SD Union Tribune-Kevin Acee]

There's some good stuff on Aztec ace Stephen Strasburg over at 619 Sports. Craig Elsten is calling for the head of DC area writer Thomas Boswell. The charge....Blasphemy!
[619 Sports]

Editor's Note:
Apologies for the randomness of the Cholla reference..there are a select few who will understand. To attain enlightenment the following may provide it for you....... but probably not.....funny none the less.

SD's Championship Drought

With all the LT/AJ drama of the last week...the report that the City is suing the Chargers for $170,000 dollars...... The City of Industry having received voter approval to begin building a New Stadium.....and finally San Diego being discussed as the team that could possibly relocate to LA...

Well I started thinking about my Charger acquaintances and how they are fairly quiet and pretty innocuous in their fan hood. But during such a week of tumult how could the silence remain so deafening?

I needed to send out a feeler.......a text message to the Ten People in my phone who were the biggest Charger Fans (Father, Brother, Friends) ....varying degrees of fan passion, no face/body painters amongst them, and it went like this:

You People are the sorriest excuse for Bolt fans EVER!
You're a Prison Sodomites' wet dream...
a quiet, passive cell mate who dare not make a peep.
Yer the reason this town never wins...
yer the reason they're moving 2 LA!
SUCK IT!

The first responses back should have been from the 1981 comedy, Stripes: "Lighten up, Francis" ....but it went like this..

Excuse Me?

My Bad

It's my son's b-day party today.
Told you Sunday at the earliest.
No cell mate for me.

What the hell is that?

If u have time 2 respond twice u have time 2 go 2 da Blog
and express yoself on da LT/AJ situation.
If u wait in silence...we'll lose the team next...luv ya

My dedication is to my team not your blog...
and I don't have time I'm working!!
That was a pretty fucked up text!!

And your blog set me back like $400

...couldn't tell ya how much the blog set me back
although it will be $200 less once "-_-_-_-_-_"
decides to pay me. Secondly...it's not my blog... it's a public forum...
a place where your happiness or displeasure can be put on record...
that of course is your prerogative. I have had discussions
w/a UT writer and the FireNorv site was discussed
by Madden n Michaels on MNF so...
the Power won't read our texts...

Call it what you want
all I'm sayin' is I wouldn't even let
my brother say shit like that to me

Lighten up, Francis.

Indeed, Sgt Hulka. Shouldn't "WE" (read:me) all lighten up and keep this thing called Football in perspective? After all, we'd hate to be SO consumed with football that we looked like this sorry SOB Giant fan...

...and a late text reply:

Go Cardinals!!!

We Love ya Shirles

A Message From The Office of The President

First 100 Days: Action Item List
Close Guantanamo...Check
Close CIA Prisons......Check
Chastise AJ Smith.....Check

AJ Smith: Front Runner for 2009 Douche of the Year

You can click both excerpts to view the entire articles from the Union Tribune but the meat is found below with intriguing comments by AJ Smith in Gold and a statement from LT's website in Blue. My assessment is that AJ Smith is a cocksucker....what's yours?

Union Tribune Article by Nick Canepa (Thursday 1/22)...Click Here For Full Text

The talk about the Chargers now centers on LT, and whether he'll be back next year, and partner Darren Sproles, who is an unrestricted free agent, and whether he'll return. But the Chargers are starting to talk contract with Rivers, whose deal expires after the 2009 season. And if they don't get him signed, they can have 10 running backs and it isn't likely to matter.

Smith has some tough decisions to make. Rivers might be one – if Smith didn't have a brain, and he does. Think he would have allowed Drew Brees to walk if he didn't have Rivers around?

“You think I wouldn't like to have Michael Turner around or Darren Sproles tied up for six years?” Smith says. “It's like I'm penalized for drafting. I try to sign guys to keep the window going, but sometimes an agent is going to say, 'Let's look around.' Kris Dielman did. I was sick. But he eventually signed back with us.

“I'm not looking forward to the things I have to do. I know bullets and shells are coming. It goes with the job. I'm aware of the community. I know what the pulse is, and I'm not afraid of it. I know I'm not 100 percent right. I'm not good at community relations. I know they're going to hate me. Nothing I can do about it.

“We're not good enough yet. I have to do a better job. We'll probably miss the playoffs along the way. That's how it is. It's on me.”

It's on him, all right. To keep Philip Rivers salaried – and standing upright.

What a freakin' crybaby! We have a diva GM....the next article excerpt is really bad, as in condescending and DICKED....

Union Tribune Article by Kevin Acee (Wednesday 1/21)...Click Here For Full Text

A.J. ON LT

Smith empathized, yet was typically unmoved by the sentiments expressed by LaDainian Tomlinson on his Web site Wednesday.

Tomlinson's statement was actually not anything different than what he had said in previous weeks on the topic of his time in San Diego possibly coming to an end.

The statement read:

“I have been getting a lot of messages on my site regarding me leaving San Diego. I feel that I need to make it very clear that I have NO intentions of leaving San Diego. San Diego is where my career started and where I'd like it to end. I have nothing but love and the upmost (sic) respect for this team, the players, and the Spanos Family. Me being traded is completely out of my hands. I have ABSOLUTELY no control in that decision making. All I can do is wait and see how it all plays out. As for now, I am a Charger and will be until I am told otherwise.”

Smith, who has acknowledged he is contemplating whether to release or trade Tomlinson or renegotiate his contract, was later asked about Tomlinson's statement.

“My first reaction was we both have similar feelings,” Smith said. “I have no intentions of leaving San Diego. San Diego is where my GM career started and where I'd like it to end. I also have nothing but love and the utmost respect for this team, the players and the Spanos family. I have absolutely no control over how long I will be with the Chargers.

“As for now, I am the Chargers' GM, and I have major decisions to ponder for the organization now and in the future. My recommendation to Dean Spanos will be what's in the best interest of the team – both short and long term. That's my job. That's what Dean hired me to do.”

If you're going to cut a San Diego Icon and future Hall of Famer at least do the guy right on his way out the door. LT doesn't deserve to be treated like this. If he's done he's done but you don't have to be a douche AJ!

Any thoughts?

Assassin Needed in San Diego

This man to the left is an assassin.

He is William Munny out of Missouri ...Killer of Women and Children.

He is unrepentant and Unforgiven.

The San Diego Chargers are in need of an Assassin. A man who roams freely on the defensive side of the ball, hunting man.

An Assassin who searches...who destroys...who does so without any regard to the concern of Commissioner Goodell's office. An Assassin set loose to work and ravage with impunity by his master: Defensive Coordinator Ron Rivera.

OK folks, you get the idea, so we'll dispense with the drama. The 2009 Draft looms large and with all of the LT release talk and Darren Sproles resigning business and the ever present discussion of Phillip's extension there is one thing that we MUST all agree upon: we have no chance at a Super Bowl Championship without a REAL Defense. Our defense has lost the nastiness that it possessed back in 2006 and we must reclaim it or forever be haunted by "what-ifs". To that end, who do we go after?

My preliminary research found me hoping for USC linebacker Rey Maualuga who incidentally was featured in a Kevin Acee UT article today. Click it...

I...am...here....to....destroy...

No matter the choice it must be a difference maker. Someone who wreaks havoc like the safeties we saw in play last weekend (Dawkins, Polamalu, Reed, Wilson).

Have you ever seen our Safety play like #43? no. Can you see our Safety playing like #43? That 'tis the question....

Those guys set the tone and in San Diego a Defensive tone must be set.

Norv can do whatever his little offensive genius heart desires on offense but it will be for naught if there is no Defense there to enforce our will. It's a fact. It is also a fact that William Munny out of Missouri...Killer of Women and Children is unavailable to roam our secondary. Stop your crying AJ and build us a Defense!

It's true...I'm unavailable...and I've killed just about everything that walked or crawled at one time.

The City of San Diego's Financial Woes/ Mayor Honors Debt

Our Mayor, Jerry Sanders, honoring the terms of his bet with Pittsburgh Mayor, Luke Ravenstahl (he who purportedly has legally changed his name to Steelerstahl). What a way to end the season.

We see that it is a Santonio Holmes Jersey........Matt Wilhelm would probably take it off the Mayor's hands.

Restructure your contract LT.

The Future of LT

Yesterday we posted an article by Jim Trotter of Sports Illustrated regarding the upheaval surrounding the potential release of LT due to Salary Cap Restrictions. LT is under contract for the next three seasons. If he is here next year his cap # is roughly $ 9 million and if he is cut he would count roughly $2 million against the cap. I am not a "cap-o-logist"...... but what we do know is that the difference in cash flow---almost $7million--- could be used to shore up the considerable number of holes that became evident this season.

Do we cut a certain Hall of Famer just shy of his 3oth birthday even though we know that, historically speaking, there is evidence that NFL running backs provide diminishing returns after this magical number?

NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

With one caveat.....LT must meet behind closed doors with AJ Smith and attempt to restructure his contract. This act alone would show LT's commitment to a possible Superbowl championship by freeing up money that could greatly help the San Diego Chargers plug holes. If there is not a restructuring of the contract we could be in for a similar type season for the Chargers in '09 or worse......LT running the ball for a rival and thriving.

I will make a guarantee..... LT is not done!

Not all running backs are created equal. Despite the rapidly approaching 30 year old status we will be able to assign to LT, let us consider a couple of things:

• 2007.....LT's injury was a knee SPRAIN. No reconstruction of any sort. I had a bad knee sprain and couldn't even think of touching the field for 3 weeks....5-6 weeks until I started to feel comfortable. I will take LT's word that he couldn't go in the AFCCG last year.
• He's a hard worker...we knew that he would work his tail off over the off season to prove the naysayers wrong....see Deion Sanders, jagov extraordinaire!
• 2008 Opener against Carolina..... He looked fantastic with BURST, until he jammed his toe. Toe's can be a "mother", ask jagov extraordinaire, Deion Sanders.

Look at this fucking asshole...how did he get a network job?

• As season progressed, the toe slowly got better and against Denver (not the strongest D) he looked great until he torqued in a strange way while scoring a TD and tore his groin up solid.
• ??????

Who is LT's Idol?

Jim Brown's rushing record broken....I was there.

That's right, Walter Payton. Walter Payton was one of the hardest workers of his time as LT is today. LT will factor in to next season because he feeds off of the naysayers...he wants to prove them wrong. It's dangerous to become too sentimental as a sports fan because we run the risk of demanding that the Chargers hold on to players who could be detrimental to our long term success. That is not the case here. This is not a Tony Gwynn situation where we kept a player who was physically done to ensure he would finish his career here. LT is not done. Nor is he a back that can rush 300 times per year anymore.

LT!!! Take a pay adjustment and begin more of a committee approach with a resigned Sproles, a more mature Hester and a possible running back of the future (either through trade: Michael Bush or via the 2009 Draft's middle rounds). LT is no Shaun Alexander so we needn't worry about that. We will rue the day that LT leaves but we also need him to accommodate the team so we can make the necessary improvements. He does have enough side deals where he should be able to offset any monetary loss due to a restructured contract.....

Chunky/NO.......................Oggi's/YES

A Rapidly Deteriorating LT Situation

The passage below is from a Sports Illustrated.com article by Jim Trotter where by the issue of LT's return to the Chargers next season is discussed at length.

"Two things I always knew about my league, the NFL: You don't ask for favors, you don't hang around. A man might love the game, but the game loves no one. The game will use what he has, [then] discard him. The sh-- isn't personal." --Hall of Fame running back Jim Brown, in his autobiography, Out of Bounds.

LaDainian Tomlinson was a rookie with the Chargers in 2001 when he read Brown's book. Asked later what resonated with him most, the former TCU star spoke about the aforementioned passage. Then he wrapped up his feelings by saying, in so many words: Pro football is a business; loyalty is a fantasy.

I am thinking about this one. Trying to remove emotion, to be rationale. I know what I want to say but find myself in a horribly awkward typing situation....so until that moment of keyboard comfort, and I set forth exactly what must be said in a closed doors meeting between AJ Smith and LaDainian Tomlinson......click the following link to read the rest of Jim Trotter's article which talks about football related material such as God, Man, and Crucifixion.......the following link.

Pardon me..... can I help you up ?

Now for a look at Linebackers.

That is #57, Matt Wilhelm of "Thee Ohio State University". He may have been the primary tackler on this play but there is only one thing we can be absolutely sure about....he's preparing to help the fallen Steeler off of the deck.

I wanna hold your hand...

We don't have the stat sheet in front of us to confirm Wilhelm's number of tackles from Sunday but we do know that he led all players in "lending a helping hand to fallen Steelers", "congratulatory slaps on the ass of the opposition", and the only "I can't wait to tell you how awesome that punt return was for a touchdown my fellow Thee Ohio State University Alumnus Santonio Holmes"....a real mouthful to be sure. It is true that Matt Wilhelm is a good sport and a nice post game interview . What Matt Wilhelm is not is an NFL Linebacker.

When you are slow and players run past you........ when you lack quickness and players sidestep you....... when you attempt to tackle players you miss entirely or they bounce off of you...... when you make an "excellent" tackle it really means that the player ran over you and you held on.....when you NEVER drive a player backwards in the tackle...... then there is a huge problem. That huge problem is that YOU ARE NOT AN NFL LINEBACKER!

Now what has been described in the previous paragraph at length is what would be a part of an NFL linebacker's skill set. There are certain physical attributes that a LB must be in possession of. Absent these skills, said linebacker must use other means at his disposal .....means that might be considered, suspect, marginal, lacking in moral fiber or dare we be blunt and say dirty! We advocate wholeheartedly, a Machiavellian approach, for any defensive player who is trying to achieve his ends. The role of the less physically gifted player is to try and hang around the League by any means necessary (see Malcolm X).....

The "means" I spoke of in The Prince, my seminal treatise on maintaining power, focused extensively on groin strikes.

..... the means to achieving a Linebackers' ends includes, but is not limited to: scratching, biting, kicking....eye gouging and fish hooking....groin striking.... head slaps, clips, horse collars and face masks....and one of our favorites: spitting in the face of the opposition thus incurring un-sportsman like penalties, and $7,500 fines but infuriating the spat on player none the less...

The Original "Romo" versus J.J. Stokes out of Point Loma HS

(a little exaggerated but the player we were thinking of when discussing white linebackers who get under your skin....Romo...the original Romo!) Wilhelm's only shot in lieu of his deficiencies is to be THAT guy who you hate to play because he gets in your head. Alas, Matt Wilhelm does not have it in him...he is a nice guy. After all, we did see him on One-on-One with Jane Mitchell.

Man I feel like a dick for saying all of the above...

This is a sentiment that we tried to convey on a call in to Scott and BR this last Monday morning but as a first time caller we quite emphatically "shit the bed". It came out something like, "Wilhelm...ahhh...helpin' every one up...errrrr...skill set....groin strikes....ahhh....errr!". So we felt that we needed to qualify our remarks in a more civil and articulate manner....if civility is at all possible when discussing dirty play and the art of the groin strike.

In Summation:

• Wilhelm must go.

• Stephen Cooper was a leader and pretty solid when he wasn't flexing his biceps at the Dolphins sidelines during game losing drives.... or missing 4 games due to illegal vitamin suspensions.

• Jyles Tucker signed a long term contract... but did he do anything this year?

• Tim Dobbins....physical but probably not more than a backup.

• Anthony Waters....reportedly a beast....couldn't work past Wilhelm? Where is he?
  

• Shawn Phillips.... seemed to miss his partner.

• Shawne Merriman.... we miss you. Thank you for remaining committed to the team even though you were on IR...Soul of the Charger Defense.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions.

Secondary Issues Are Plentiful

I had a friend in college. A good friend to this day. An upstanding citizen (British) this friend of mine. However, he was known to piss himself when he became inebriated. Once, he even opened up his special lady friend's underwear drawer whilst she was on holiday...and pissed in it. An upstanding citizen this friend. Oh, yes.....he also has a proclivity for shitting the bed whilst drunk.

Pictured at right is third year corner Cletis Gordon out of Jackson State, Alma mater to Walter Payton. I don't know how Cletis behaves when drinking but I do know this......on Sunday January 11th, 2009, Cletis Gordon "SHIT THE BED". Every time something bad happened, Cletis Gordon was at the center of the mess. Pass completion after pass completion...there's #24. Big pick-up coupled with a 15 yard un-sportsman like conduct penalty...again #24.

It wasn't the literal Bed Shitting I had heard about from my buddy's college days but the figurative type...the type we have become all too accustomed to this season by our Defensive Backs.

C'mon did you see what I did to Jeff Garcia's face?

After Quentin Jammer brought the wood against Hines Ward on this little incompletion I don't think I saw #23 again.....all I saw was the "bed shitter". Jammer leaves with injury and in enters a disgusting mess. Now, I think that the Steelers were the better team so don't mistake this as an effort to assign the loss to #24-Shitter of Beds---but he sure didn't help our cause. How does a guy get an opportunity like that in a playoff game and then proceed to follow up his constant burns with a 15 yard penalty? I bring this up because the time has come to assess who we are and begin to make the necessary changes. If a guy has limited skills and a .10 cent head, roster spots need to start opening up.

"It'll be warmer this way, trust me!"..... Our DBs in a Nutshell.

Nice train! In addition to looking like our DBs are sodomizing Big Ben they are failing horribly at what EVERY FOOTBALL PLAYER IN THE NFL should be able to do: tackle! Roethlisberger's a big fella but this is ridiculous and encapsulates the essence of our defensive backs. Does anyone remember the NFL Films segment on the little corner from the Redskins named Pat Fisher? He was like 5'9" and he would battle twice a year against 6'8" Harold Carmichael of the Eagles....fella was 5' NOTHING and he would kill guys in the tackle! This must improve.

Cromartie: "Hey Cletis! Stretch it out good. I've shit the bed in every game this year except against Brett Favre in week 3. I'll show you how to STB like Primetime!
Gordon: "If only I get the chance....STB...STB...STB..."

Cromartie was a net loss this year in every way. We have come to find out that he played the season with a fractured hip so perhaps he gets a pass and we reevaluate next year. We knew there had to be an injury but they covered it up pretty well....although every QB in the league DID attack AC every game so I guess they were savvy.

Where to begin? Well we've just begun and our Secondary has issues. What now is the resolution?

Discuss...

Season's End Breeds Existential Dillema...hyperbole alert...

"Tim Dobbins and Eric Weddle Stop Willie Parker" was the UT caption for this photo....Are you kidding me! We didn't stop Willie Parker ALL DAY LONG...nor is tackling really when two human beings ride you 'til you fall 5 yards down field...sorry but it's not....and it's a problem worth discussing.

Ye quietly devoted Charger Fans and Patriot Haters: I found myself quite conflicted this morning as I decided whether or not to keep my New Year's resolution. Do I post Dear Patriot Tears (wretched Patriot nonsense) every day when I feel as though I need to take a break and decompress after a difficult end to the Bolts' season? I decided to abandon Patriot Tears and take a break all together...

Then I changed my mind. I looked at the ol' Google Analytics this morning and I was quickly reminded that while the majority of people who view this Blog each day are from CA and presumably Charger Fans there is also a disparate collection of readers from Australia to Singapore, Brazil to the UK, and France to the Eastern Block of Europe. This is to say nothing for the fact that nearly 40/50 U.S. states have taken a peek. At that moment I decided that the Patriot Haters of the World needed their daily fix of Bahhston Cries and that the Trail of Tears would continue...

Taking the Piss out of Patriot Fan is too much Fun to Abandon

As a Charger Fan, however, I was not crazy about espousing Patriot Hatred while remaining mum about MY team...The San Diego Chargers. In the form of new ownership for the Padres we have witnessed a glimmer of hope sparkling on the distant horizon that is the Padres' 2009 baseball season yet I find myself still very detached. Because of my continued attachment to football I would like to continue talking football and therefore there will be no break.

This is an issue worth discussing. What's the LT answer?

I know people are reading but I often feel like a tree falling in the wilderness with no one to witness it....does that tree make a sound with out a soul there to hear it? The origins of this blog were rooted in a desire for a Charger/Padre fan to vent about East Coast Sports Elitism.....specifically in the form of the New England Patriot Fan base. This blog was also meant to be a forum for others of like mind (trolls are also welcome as we champion dissent) to comment, discuss, propose, and answer questions amongst themselves. My writing is long winded, verbose, occasionally funny and just downright stupid sometimes....but it is always rooted in being a fan of San Diego teams who have NEVER won a championship ( I refuse to count the Chargers' 1963 AFL Championship against the Boston Patriots as it was before my time....yet I love the irony of the team that we beat).

So I guess my point is this: What do the Chargers need to do to improve for next season? What are our primary draft needs? How can I interject Jessica Alba into an off season discussion forum? These are all pressing issues that demand resolution.....we need your comments though...let's discuss...

Commenting For Dummies:

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...and so it ends, Chargers 24 -Steelers 35

Probably not the one play we ran during the 3rd quarter

The Chargers kick a FG and position themselves to go into the half with a lead....but then the dreaded "Prevent" defense rears its ugly head and right quick we're down 10-14 going into the half. I don't remember who posited the ol' maxim that, "the Prevent defense, Prevents you from Winning", but boy does it ring true. It would be a harbinger of things to come.

The 3rd quarter began with an old fashioned 8 minute drive which was quickly followed by a big Sproles return and an even bigger tipped Philip Rivers passed, picked off by Larry Foote.

When the 3rd quarter was all said and done we had possessed the ball for :17 seconds....1 play...and 2 turnovers.... and a season slipped away.

Upon reflection it's worth noting that when you have to look at all of these little moments within the contest and you begin to play the "if this, if that game".....it quite simply means that you weren't the better team. The better team won out today.

Forthcoming will be the 2008 Season Obituary...it seems fitting, as I purchased the Headstone for 2008 back in August.

A FINAL NOTE:

When the game was over, the house cleaned up and family and guests gone for the night I walked outside and sat down on the patio. In one arm I held my little Daughter who came into this world during the Chargers' preseason (a baptism by fire) and in my hand a mug, from which I drank the cup of coffee of the year (Blue Mountain Jamaican of which my brother had no business buying for me). The moon slowly crept over the easterly mountains, full, bright, and orange. I hadn't seen a moon look like that since a spring break in Punta Penasco (Rocky Point).

Here I sat, in mid-January, short sleeves, bare feet, outside and watching a killer moon ascend into a crystal clear star filled sky induced by our all too frequent Santa Ana Winds ( they are becoming more frequent, so it seems). I thought, boy am I lucky.

I just spent the whole afternoon with some of my best friends watching a football game. College friends and family....high fiving and cursing...eating, drinking, laughing. Thanks for spending the day with me. While it was not the outcome we wanted I couldn't have asked for better company to suffer through it with me. I thought about this good fortune as that moon appeared from out of no where and realized that it was a sign... a sign of future days and and seasons...a sign of hope. Maybe this was the obituary? Better put that headstone up so they know we were here......

Thanks Big Fella