Sometimes we have a tendency to get ahead of ourselves and there is perhaps no better phrase to illustrate this point than the words uttered by The Wolf to Jules Winfield and Vincent Vega after they had cleaned up Marvin's Brains in Pulp Fiction....To quell the notion that they were home free he reminded them:
"Let's don't go suckin' each others' dicks just yet!"
To that end it would be premature to so quickly award the next Gaping V without having seen the remainder of the games on this week's slate. The award named after the Jerry Curl sportin', Rec Specs wearin', neck brace stylin', high steppin' right out of bounds via the Southern Methodist University deserves to see equal opportunity given. Our front runner, after three horrific plates of turkey, thus far:
Detroit Lion Safety Daniel Bullocks
We have widened the parameters once again...defenders should have the opportunity to be labeled as female anatomy as well. Playing in front of a national audience on Thanksgiving with the ignominy of a winless season in the making....this guy pulled the old 'OLE'...we weren't fooled! What made the lack of effort so much worse is that it was Soft As Cookie Dough Lendale White who-came-a lumbering through the goal line. C'mon Bullocks! Grabbing on to soft and cuddly things is so nice, so easy...Never mind the Bullocks, here's the Vaginas!
Out in the west we call that bullshit...Ole!
Whiiiiiiifffffff! No wins are comin' with tackles like that!
Now we realize Lendale looks like a big fella...but trust us, he's a soft bowl of cookie dough like Mom used to make. This is Lendale coming out of USC at the 2006 Scouting Combine....
My last name is White, not Hut...WTF?
Soft, no? He'd probably explode upon impact with a solid shoulder. He's come a long way but Lendale's still a softie...
You'll never see this guy with his shirt off...even as a more svelte NFL RB, Lendale endlessly loses shit in that belly button (usually car keys)....which brings us back to Daniel Bullocks.
You had a chance to blow a fat man up in front of the whole USA....we'll never know whether gravy or jello would have hemorrhaged out of Lendale, upon being dealt a vicious "Ronnie Lott like hit", for one reason and one reason only....you, Daniel Bullocks, decided to show us your Gaping V.
PS
Could it be more fitting that your name translates to castrated bull? Well, it was an awfully docile attempt at a tackle.
You're on notice, Bullocks! There's a lot of games left this week so here's to you sliding your way out of it.
Detroit Lion Safety Daniel Bullocks
We have widened the parameters once again...defenders should have the opportunity to be labeled as female anatomy as well. Playing in front of a national audience on Thanksgiving with the ignominy of a winless season in the making....this guy pulled the old 'OLE'...we weren't fooled! What made the lack of effort so much worse is that it was Soft As Cookie Dough Lendale White who-came-a lumbering through the goal line. C'mon Bullocks! Grabbing on to soft and cuddly things is so nice, so easy...Never mind the Bullocks, here's the Vaginas!
Out in the west we call that bullshit...Ole!
Whiiiiiiifffffff! No wins are comin' with tackles like that!
Now we realize Lendale looks like a big fella...but trust us, he's a soft bowl of cookie dough like Mom used to make. This is Lendale coming out of USC at the 2006 Scouting Combine....
My last name is White, not Hut...WTF?
Soft, no? He'd probably explode upon impact with a solid shoulder. He's come a long way but Lendale's still a softie...
smart money's on gravy not jello
You'll never see this guy with his shirt off...even as a more svelte NFL RB, Lendale endlessly loses shit in that belly button (usually car keys)....which brings us back to Daniel Bullocks.
You had a chance to blow a fat man up in front of the whole USA....we'll never know whether gravy or jello would have hemorrhaged out of Lendale, upon being dealt a vicious "Ronnie Lott like hit", for one reason and one reason only....you, Daniel Bullocks, decided to show us your Gaping V.
PS
Could it be more fitting that your name translates to castrated bull? Well, it was an awfully docile attempt at a tackle.
You're on notice, Bullocks! There's a lot of games left this week so here's to you sliding your way out of it.
